About Us

The Founding

The Best Amazon Affiliate Ever was founded in April 2026, though depending on who you ask, the idea was conceived much earlier. Our CEO claims it came to them in a dream. Our CFO (who is imaginary) insists we were inspired by a spreadsheet. The Board of Directors (also us) has declined to settle the matter, citing it as “irrelevant to our Q2 projections.”

What we can agree on is this: we looked at the landscape of Amazon affiliate sites and found it wanting. Every site was pretending to be something it wasn't. “We tested 47 mattresses.” No, you didn't. “Our team of experts.” It's one person and a freelance writer from Upwork. We decided the world needed an affiliate site that told the truth, even when the truth was that our total revenue could be expressed as a fraction of a Squatty Potty.

Organizational Structure

Our corporate hierarchy is flat. Not Silicon Valley “flat” where there are still seven levels of management and a Chief People Officer. Actually flat. The Board of Directors, the CEO, the CFO, the editorial team, and the intern are all the same person. The intern is unpaid, which is technically a labor violation, but we have chosen not to report ourselves.

Our Mission

To be the Best Amazon Affiliate Site Ever. We acknowledge this is a low bar. Most Amazon affiliate sites are SEO farms with stock photos and prose generated by language models. We are different in that we are fully aware of what we are, and we find it very funny. Our mission is to recommend products with conviction, transparency, and an appropriate amount of self-awareness about the fact that we earn $0.75 per Squatty Potty sold.

Contact

You may reach us at our offices. Our offices are a Gmail address. We do not currently have a phone number, a physical address, or a receptionist. If you need to reach us urgently, consider that “urgently” may be a strong word for matters relating to an Amazon affiliate website.